Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
