Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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