in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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