What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
How's work?
Spinning.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
