i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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