1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
accomplished twins. life is a go
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.