Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Randomize
