Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of