Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
