cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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