Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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