so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
