i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
