Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
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The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
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If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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