I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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