I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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