I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
