Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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