His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
