Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
