in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize