Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
