I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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