Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
