problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
