Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
