I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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