So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize