I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
