Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(860): View more from Connecticut

New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache

Fav 22 4833 959
share tweet
(503): View more from Oregon

do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?

Fav 14 857 5258
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(623): View more from Arizona

His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?

Fav 15 7249 1381
share tweet
(210): View more from Texas

I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.

Fav 20 1346 6178
share tweet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(757): View more from Virginia

I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.

Fav 7 1108 2688
share tweet
(920): View more from Wisconsin

If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.

Fav 15 1610 1064
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(415): View more from California

I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.

Fav 6 2633 1229
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(931): View more from Tennessee

I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children

Fav 4 1226 695
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(978): View more from Massachusetts

Moral of the story: fuckboys never change

Fav 0 491 290
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT