can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
