Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
