I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
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and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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