:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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