You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Dicks are not precious.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Randomize