My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
