so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blow job season was short but glorious.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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