On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
