I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
