Is it normal to miss your booty call?
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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