i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
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they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
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We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY