First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
