Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
