hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
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