We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
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if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
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Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
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