best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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