Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
