We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
