I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
