so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
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hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
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I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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