new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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