There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
